"I SWEAR I don't have a bomb, just titanium in my fallopian tubes!"

Yeah, imagine explaining THAT at airport security! 

On Friday, I had the Essure procedure performed.  Mike and I have decided that we cannot handle another screaming infant our family is complete.  He was willing to go under the knife and have a vasectomy, but I saw a commercial for Essure and talked to the Dr. about it.  We weighed the pros and cons of each and decided to go with the Essure.  Let me tell you, if you are done having kids and trying to decide which one of you should take one for the team and make it a done deal, I say go for it, ladies!  This procedure was done in the the doctor's office and involved absolutely NO cutting or anesthesia.  I was given a Zofran and a Vicodin, and a shot of Toridal before the procedure.  I then got to relax in a recliner with my book and my iPod for about an hour.  Then, the procedure was performed in about 15-20 minutes!  I walked out of the office with a few minor cramps.  Friday afternoon I was a little groggy and crampy, but was perfectly fine on Saturday!

Basically what Essure involves is the Dr. inserting tiny little springs made of nickel titanium alloy and stainless steel into each of my fallopian tubes.  Over three months, my body will naturally form scar tissue around the springs, creating a permanent barrier.  Here's a little illustration:

Now, I get to carry an identification card saying that I do have these metal implants inside my body.  The nurse said that it might not happen, but just in case I do set off metal detectors, I just flash this pretty card and hopefully be on my merry way!  I go back in three months to have a test done to make sure there is 100% blockage.